I began these mindful drawings in a fragile, unsettled state of mind. My thoughts felt scattered, restless, overlapping, too many at once. So I picked up colours and let them move without planning, without forcing sense or structure. I didn’t try to control the flow; I let the flow carry me. As the colours settled, so did parts of me.
While doing this, a thought stayed with me: Is this even anything? Later, that thought came back through others. Some asked, “What kind of painting is this?” Some said, “It has no meaning.” Some looked longer, trying to extract logic, trying to name it, trying to make sense of it. Others simply found it beautiful.
I noticed how familiar this felt. How people always want to define, label, approve, or dismiss. How art becomes a mirror for their own need to understand or control. And I realised, this is not new. This is human nature.
But this wasn’t made for explanation. It was made for survival. For breathing. For letting my scattered thoughts land somewhere gentle
I don’t need everyone to understand it. I don’t need to defend it. People may say so many different things. They always will. And what we need to do is to continue to do what we do, quietly, honestly, and with care! That’s enough!
And somehow, in the midst of all this, these paintings reside in a foreign land, resting there with a grace that still surprises me!
If someone listens to a song And she appears in the verse Not summoned, not expected Just felt, like a breeze through a half-open window Then that is love in its gentlest form …
Not loud, not declared But tucked between notes Where memory breathes, and the heart still knows What it never forgot …
And if they play it again Not to relive the past But to feel her near Just once more …
Alas, the song fades! But somewhere in its echo lives a moment They never said goodbye to …
I was listening to a song when a sudden thought settled in, if someone ever hears a song and thinks of me, isn’t that one of the most deeply emotional and sacred gestures?
That moment stayed with me, and I ended up writing ‘When a Song Remembers Her’ … It doesn’t follow any structure or rhyme, but it holds something personal, love, memory, longing …
Maybe it’s a poem. Maybe it’s just a feeling shaped into words. I’m not entirely sure …
But I wonder, what do you think, can something like this be called a poem? Or does a poem need rules to be real, or can it simply be a moment that moves us? Also, I’m just wondering about you, have you ever heard a song and found someone gently returning to your heart through it?
Tell me, Isn’t it beautiful how music remembers what we try to forget?
When R stepped off the small plane that landed in Paro, Bhutan, she felt something shift, not dramatically, but like the settling of dust after a long journey …
The valley stretched wide beneath her, green and golden in patches, framed by distant, unmoving mountains. It was quieter than she expected. Even the wind seemed to move gently, as though not to disturb the stillness that held this place together …
She had arrived not as a tourist, but as a teacher, a woman in her late thirties from Bangladesh, with a degree in English and a quiet but persistent belief in meaningful work. Years ago, it had been just a passing dream, one that took root on a monsoon evening back home, when her father handed her a book after returning from a short business trip to Bhutan: Married to Bhutan by Linda Leaming. She didn’t know then that the book would become more than a gift. It would become a roadmap …
She read it in one sitting, and then again, slower. The words painted a life far from the chaos she knew: one of rhythm, simplicity, joy without extravagance. Something about it stirred her. Not just the country itself, but the idea that a person could choose a gentler life, one rooted in intention. Ever since, the desire to live and work in Bhutan stayed with her, not loudly, but like a thread running through her decisions, pulling her quietly in one direction …
It took years to make it happen. Teaching jobs weren’t easy to come by. There were rejections, delays, moments of self-doubt. But eventually, things aligned. A school in Paro welcomed her. And so she came, with a suitcase full of essentials and a heart full of the unknown …
The school was modest: a few classrooms, basic supplies, and a staff of deeply committed educators. Her students were bright-eyed and curious, some from the surrounding hills, others from the valley towns. They called her Miss R with respect and affection. She taught English, but often, she felt she was learning more than she was giving …
In Paro, life had a slower pulse. Mornings began with mist hanging low over the rice fields. The walk to school was lined with prayer flags and the occasional passing cow. She started wearing the kira on school days, awkwardly at first, then with growing comfort. Suja, salted butter tea, became something she reached for on chilly afternoons …
She missed home sometimes: the sound of the call to prayer, her mother’s cooking, the overlapping laughter of cousins. But Bhutan had offered her something she hadn’t expected, a deep and gentle space to grow. Here, her work felt rooted. Each lesson she planned, each conversation with a student, each moment of solitude looking out at the hills, it all added up to a life that felt fuller, simpler, and strangely her own …
Some evenings, when the rain returned and wrapped the mountains in silver, she would pull out the old book her father had given her. The pages were worn now, the cover faded. But the feeling it gave her, that tug toward a life of simplicity and purpose, still felt as clear as it did all those years ago …
Living in Bhutan hadn’t made her someone new. It had returned her to someone she had always hoped to be: grounded, purposeful, and joyful. She wasn’t searching anymore. She was, finally, living the life she had once only read about …
She is here … Teaching … Living near the mountain valleys she once only imagined … And in doing so, she has become a part of a beautiful story …
And at the end of each day, amidst mountain valleys, in the hush of Paro’s twilight, that felt like enough …
#roksanatales
While there in Bhutan
Bhutan has a sacred place in my heart. I visited once, and it felt like stepping into a world where everything slows down. Peace seemed to rise gently with the mountains …
I remember the kind people, the prayer flags fluttering in the wind, and the quiet beauty of the dzongs. Everything left a deep impression on me …
Rafting was one of the most exciting parts, unexpectedly wild, joyful, and full of laughter. That whole trip was truly an adventure I’ll never forget …
Before leaving, I bought the book Married to Bhutan from Paro International Airport. After reading it, something in me shifted. It changed the way I see life, more simply, more mindfully, and with a greater sense of purpose
Now the evening descends in stillness And the burdens of the day return to the hands of the Divine He knows what the heart held in silence And wraps the soul in mercy, soft as dusk …
Recently I happen to read a haiku by Bashō: Such stillness the cicada’s cry drills deep into the rocks.
It stayed with me. The depth, it felt like something more than words. That’s when I found the Japanese word Yūgen. It means a deep, mysterious beauty that can’t be fully explained. It felt just right for what I was feeling, so I kept it with me, as the title for something I’m slowly shaping in my heart …
Yūgen (幽玄) A deep, mysterious sense of beauty and the grace of the universe, often felt during twilight or in quiet moments
Your absence hums like a violin string snapped mid-note A comet that vanished before its trail could unfold The eclipse of a lighthouse on a storm-battered coast …
Time crawls, a spider weaving webs of empty hours Memories linger like fireflies trapped in a jar Each one dimming, yet refusing to fade into stars …
Your voice was rain stitching needles through thirsty leaves Now silence looms like an unfinished symphony’s grief A mosaic missing its most vivid, sacred piece…
I search for you in the scent of forgotten gardens In waves that speak like poets lost to their stanzas In winds that carry secrets of unuttered mantras …
Truth is, I miss you like the moon misses its tides A ship adrift, no constellations to confide The ache of a heart where all its echoes reside
I hope this letter finds you well. As Aristotle once said, “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” With that in mind, I wanted to share some important reminders—lessons I’ve learned and wisdom I’ve gathered over time …
First, remember that happiness isn’t just a destination; it’s the journey itself. Think of each moment as a precious gem to be savored. Immerse yourself in what you love, whether it’s painting a vivid canvas, losing yourself in a good book, tending to your garden, or enjoying the company of friends. Don’t hold back. Learn the practice of “wabi-sabi.” While wabi-sabi primarily focuses on finding beauty in imperfection and the transient nature of life, it also emphasizes appreciating simple, everyday moments. Appreciate more of your self-care and personal expression. Dress in your favorite outfits, experiment with makeup, or enjoy a pampering session as a way to celebrate yourself and find joy in small, delightful ways. Embrace and cherish the present moment …
Don’t overthink. Eliminate self-doubt and self-criticism. Don’t ever think you’re not enough; you are enough, just as you are. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Don’t let negative thoughts take root in your mind. Instead, focus on starting a skincare routine, eating healthy meals, maintaining regular exercise or yoga, and taking care of your personal hygiene. Remember, your brain and body are closely linked; when one suffers, the other often does too …
My dear, do you laugh often? Laughter is a reflection of our inner state of being, so let it flow freely. Find that spark that lights up your eyes. Be passionate about something—whether it’s a hobby, a project, playing an instrument, exploring nature, or even just a ride all on your own …
Seek connection and company. Share your joys, sorrows, and daily happenings with the right people. Building and nurturing these relationships is essential for your well-being. The support and understanding of others can provide strength and perspective in difficult times. But also never ever let anyone tell you otherwise or bring you down …
Read as many books as you can, starting from a young age. As George R.R. Martin said, “A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies . . . The man who never reads lives only one.” Reading will enrich your life and make the most of your time in the best possible ways …
Please darling don’t forget to walk daily, move, run, or dance, for ‘to keep the body in good health is a duty… otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear.'” – Buddha
You have the power to create a beautiful life for yourself. Embrace every opportunity to grow, learn, and love. You’ve got this. The time is now to be bold about who you are. Hold no regrets. Try more things. Cross some lines. It won’t matter to anyone. Love yourself as you are. And remember, you are always beautiful, kind, and worthy of being loved, cared for, and respected.
Consider Oprah Winfrey’s journey. Despite facing significant challenges and adversities in her early life, she embraced every opportunity for growth and learning, ultimately becoming one of the most influential and successful figures in the world. Her story is a testament to the power of self-love, resilience, and the pursuit of one’s true self. As she often says, “The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams.”
You’ll discover a unique happiness that comes from simply living and enjoying everyday, mundane pleasures. Imagine a painter who, after years of searching for inspiration in grand landscapes, finally finds true joy in capturing the simple beauty of a sunlit kitchen, a blooming garden, or the quiet streets of their neighborhood. Their art reflects the contentment found in everyday moments, illustrating how the ordinary can bring profound happiness.
Love deeply and passionately. Someone unique will come into your life. He won’t possess the conventional markers of success you once thought were essential in a partner. On your first date, he might give you a ride home on the handlebars of his bike because he doesn’t have a car and can’t afford to rent one. But don’t worry about these. Rather you may find that he’s incredibly funny, intelligent, and has remarkable integrity.
And lastly, be funny, kind, empathetic, caring, and respectful. Be vulnerable. Wouldn’t you agree that these qualities make life richer and more fulfilling?
You warm my heart, Roksana
#roksanatales
A letter to the younger self
The few coloring, drawings, paintings that I enjoyed doing in this July
However, no matter how old you are, there’s always something to learn from any moment or from anyone who is an integral part of your life right now. Learn what you can from those you admire and most importantly from the walk of your own life and apply it in real sense as much as possible ….
My Dear, It’s likely that as you were writing to me, I was walking back home from work, taking in the beauty of the flowers in my charming neighborhood …
I adore my neighborhood. The scenery is incredibly captivating with its tall trees and beautiful blossoming flowers. I frequently opt to walk home from work, as it’s only 850-1000 steps from my workplace to my home …
So, what I was saying about my neighborhood!
I really admire the shade under the tall trees and enjoy watching the breeze rustle through the colorful bougainvillea. It’s lovely to see people walking along the footpath and enjoying their time. As I passed by the mosque, I noticed people seeking relief from the scorching heat under the trees in front of the mosque. I adore the vibrant colors, the fragrant scents, and the sense of simplicity in that scene.
It was scorching heat outside. And there I found myself embracing the warmth of the surroundings. There was refreshing cool breeze and thoughts of you. It may sound unbelievable, but it’s the truth. Your presence in my thoughts remains unwavering amidst the whirlwind of life’s events. Please, believe that.
So, where was I? I was expressing my fondness for the delightful, blossoming, shady path in my neighborhood and how much I’m fond of you …
Today I took a break from work as I was feeling an intermittent cramping in my abdomen. Some rest will help me feel better. However,. Sudden leave from work leads me to think, “How can I best utilize this extra time at home?” Swiftly, I begin mentally compiling a to-do list. Eventually, I decided to walk back home…
While returning, I found myself feeling happy to see these blossoms and greens. The outside heat was too strong but I cared less and I continued walking, intermittently pausing to capture photographs.
I returned home and checked my email once again. I was so surprised to receive your mail. This news brightened my day so much that now I feel inspired to spend the next few hours painting.
I find great pleasure in painting when my heart is filled with happiness and I was very happy to read your mail.
Your words and painting will grace my own solitude for today, now and here.
Do you enjoy solitude?
I eagerly await your response to my somewhat poetic emails.
There once was a curious soul Wondering how your days roll What activities fill your time … It’s something she often wonders about … Completely immersed in the moment
#roksanatales
When I’m happy, either I sing or I paint. when I’m very happy I do both 😊
Can you perceive An unseen bond between us? It ties us together; trust it, my love … It’s invisible, yet unmistakably sensed Certainly by me … Do you not sense it as well? A connection surpassing time and distance… Ours is an endless bond Our eternal, cherished blessing …
Through moments fleeting and forever The thread weaves its way … Stretching, sometimes tangling, Yet resilient, unyielding … As time, as it is infinite, it will stay …
Oh, my beloved, my dear … Please pardon me, the mistake was mine Throughout the moments we shared And the clarity we’ve known … It took me a while To fully understand your essence …
Now I know This love endures, and Time, place, circumstance may shift, This love is unbroken, my constant uplift …
#roksanatales
Cherish caring hearts; love’s true wealth …
I’m uncertain if the title fits these verses. Do you have a suggestion?
Steam swirls, Chaotic warmth in coffee cup, Awake, senses grace, within ….
#roksanatales
Humepenthe/ made up (n.) someone who makes you forget er your pain and sorrow; someone with whom you forget all your worries ….
Humepenthe is a made up word (@cosmosbyrudra) made with combination of human + nepenthe which human form of a drug which was given to people to forget or lessen their pain and suffering in ancient time ….
She’s truly honest In her honest prayers … Though within her unspeakable despair And impossibility, She couldn’t go away far; But always come back quite inevitably …
All frailties alone cast upon Her feeble hope that always exits; Her nature reigns upon her own soul … She holds on to her faith; yet so unfair her torments, Make the despair ever greater Widening her tears itself betwixt, She watches feebly all souls’ cruel wits …
Impossibility goes not to heaven Like a weak and an easy prey; Thinking is not same as knowing, So at her best, she spends in praying, Trusting each and everyday. At times, she tries to cease time But not her endless pray ….
(Whatever you wish: You know that you know But know you not; Truth is her lord And always you shall be; ‘My dear, (she whispers) I’ll serve what you deserve, Even if you talk So ungratefully. :Whenever you wish)
The injustice rankles yet More often loving comes to her aid. It is always worth keeping, Her emotion that rises and trips away springs; For the sake of her truth, she brings The words that breathe a reason Scaring the unfinished conversation even with self …
Though her skies are too dark (at the moment) With flowers in odor and in hue in sight, Now she excludes all and wanders through the night … Being more calm and bright, Letting all her doubts, thoughts and emotions pass by To enter the heaven, the endless light,
Lastly, she takes her flight.
So long, she loved at her best, A bittersweet farewell to her dear is the rest … She writes her last inscription just to let you in, ‘Please don’t hurt my soulful prayers, Forgive my selfish tears …. As I would take rebirth in this world, With my passion for you Deep, and fully blooming And quivers with bliss.’
#roksanatales
Above, a bit complex verses, though I think it’s fine …
In a poem I usually use whatever can be called the melody long before I have reached an understanding of all that it might mean. Sometimes I think I can use that to my hearts’ fullness and other time I feel that it’s unfinished yet again conveying the emotions which convince me to love it as it is … To me, poetry attracts when only emotions endures ….
I hope you would love this song which I have added in my this painting work in progress video. It’s one of my favourite.
I love this song, ‘Live More & Love More’ by Cat Burns. I love it’s melody and energy.
It tells about starting whatever it is you want to start and doing whatever it is you want to do in life. Because we only have one life, and we deserve to live it to the fullest. Such a positive powerful song.
It beautifully expresses to find a balance between growing ourselves as individuals and sharing our love.
“If there’s something you wanna do, just do it Don’t let your head stop your heart from moving If there’s someone you wanna talk to, talk to ’em Who knows who we’d be if we just Live more and love more We all just need to live more and love more So hug your kids, tell them you love them Have some heart but make sure it’s open Play by risk ’cause time gets stolen Maybe speak less and listen more ‘Cause life’s too short You only have one It might sound cliche But your life can start when you choose it to When you choose it to” ….
Another song that I love so much is ‘Fix You’ by Coldplay…. Love these lines so much,
Lights will guide you home And ignite your bones And I will try to fix you’ ….
Isn’t it beautiful?
What is/ are your favourite powerful positive song/s?
I put my heart and soul into my work, and I have lost my mind in the process. -Vincent Willem Van Gogh
It is true for each of my creative works. My paintings have its stories and often they echo my deep-rooted emotions and deep talk with myself. I live in each of its stories and moments of creativity.
So here I so very wish to share my stories of two paintings with you all.
A Tale of Twin Paintings
Finally Falguni has the other twin painting tittle ‘Hope Shines’. I am super happy that she has chosen this one. And then there the first twin painting titled ‘Follow the Soothing Breeze, Here’ already owned by my daughter …
Why am I saying this two paintings as ‘TWIN PAINTINGS’?
Because I painted this two paintings simultaneously, keeping them side by side using only one art paper, dividing them with masking tapes. And they both have the same wavelengths I felt at the time I was painting them. While I was working on this Twins, during their creative process, colouring, taking pauses, brushing, re-brushing, stroking the brushes here and there, I remember I was contemplating on various things, specially doing meaningful purposeful work for the rest of my life. A purpose greater than life itself. Many a times I felt discouraged and demotivated, but never ever I felt lost as to what next. I’ve been always having different ideas to move forward in life. Never look back what I couldn’t, but moving forward what I can. Just like the titles of the Twin Paintings, I have been following a Soothing Breeze instilled in my heart all my life keeping my ‘Hope’ Shines throughout this life’s journey so far ….
Amazing, na?
Now I’m so glad that one twin painting is with my little sister-friend Falguni, and the other twin has its permanent residence at my dear daughter’s far away homesweethome.
When I first shared the two paintings after seemingly finishing them with my daughter, she immediately asked me to keep the ‘Follow the Soothing Breeze Here’ painting for her. I just loved the urgency to book the painting for herself. So I did keep it aside for her, happily. Last time I visited NY, I took that painting for her home there. She has already few of my paintings at her home. Now all the people come to visit her place, they ask her about the paintings and she feels so proud to let them know, ‘My mom is an artist. These are her paintings.’ She has been my very own cheerleader from the day I started the painting journey in 2020. And from then onwards, I listened to her many suggestions for my Jian Bird Creates and my painting journey. She absolutely adores my creative style of living and specially this journey inspires her to follow the soothing breeze deep inside her loving beautiful heart for herself.
Now ‘Hope Shines’ had lost its Twin and was alone, passing its days with other dazzling paintings around it. One day Falguni came at my Fund raising event ‘Meet & Greet’ for love and light. She walked through my small Jian Bird Gallery, and there she found her ‘Hope Shines’. As definitely always her hope shines through all the ups and downs of life’s tragic and unexpected happenings and yet she continues to shine ✨ For that reason or some other, she decided to own the ‘Hope Shines’ …
For an artist, the canvas is his life, breath and philosophy. So when someone owns their artwork or creative piece, and genuinely wants to keep those with them, I as an artist consider it as honor. I feel they can relate to the piece as I do. And for most of my artworks, I had this conversational experience to tell a story or to evoke an emotion. And there are some who wants me to attach the story with it. I feel it’s a complete connection, from soul to soul.
Now I know my very first TWIN paintings will always remain as their beloved treasures at their soul-home wherever they go. They are themselves two amazing souls in the beautiful Earth, self-made, selfless and strong.
Lastly, I just want to say to ALL of you; Never forget. Hope shines only for those who believe.
Thanks, kindly, for stopping by and reading this long note from me.
Life is somewhat grey Everywhere Just monotony Lost and lonely …
Don’t you know?
Only when you stay Life is colorful …. A hopeful glow Echoes of brighter joy Birds sing cheerful songs Rays of sunshines warm my cheeks My yellow dyed dreams return …
Roksana Tales 