I began these mindful drawings in a fragile, unsettled state of mind. My thoughts felt scattered, restless, overlapping, too many at once. So I picked up colours and let them move without planning, without forcing sense or structure. I didn’t try to control the flow; I let the flow carry me. As the colours settled, so did parts of me.
While doing this, a thought stayed with me: Is this even anything? Later, that thought came back through others. Some asked, “What kind of painting is this?” Some said, “It has no meaning.” Some looked longer, trying to extract logic, trying to name it, trying to make sense of it. Others simply found it beautiful.
I noticed how familiar this felt. How people always want to define, label, approve, or dismiss. How art becomes a mirror for their own need to understand or control. And I realised, this is not new. This is human nature.
But this wasn’t made for explanation. It was made for survival. For breathing. For letting my scattered thoughts land somewhere gentle
I don’t need everyone to understand it. I don’t need to defend it. People may say so many different things. They always will. And what we need to do is to continue to do what we do, quietly, honestly, and with care! That’s enough!
And somehow, in the midst of all this, these paintings reside in a foreign land, resting there with a grace that still surprises me!
Toruna walks almost every day with her son. These walks are special for her, a time to breathe, notice, and listen to the stories unfolding around. Every face, every moment on the street seems to whisper something to her heart. Walking makes her more thoughtful, more aware of life’s small wonders and struggles …
One evening, on their way to the park, Toruna noticed a tiny woollen cap lying on the road. She stopped and told her son, ‘Maybe a mother was carrying her sleeping baby on her shoulder, and while walking home, the little cap slipped off without her noticing. And then when she reached home and saw it missing, she must have felt sad, that cute little cap of her dear child is lost!’ Her son smiled and said, ‘You’re such a storyteller, Mom.’
They both laughed and kept walking.
But Toruna’s eyes continued to wander, always finding small stories hidden in everyday life …
Near the park gate, she saw twin toddlers quarreling over lollipops, their mother watching with an amused smile. One of the twins looked a bit grumpier, & Toruna observed the mother gently scolding and laughing at the same time ….
A few steps ahead, a woman in niqab (a veil on her face) walked alone on the footpath. She seemed quiet, almost wrapped in her own thoughts. Perhaps she was returning from a long day at work, thinking about bills, groceries, and what to cook for dinner. Her steps were slow, her shoulders slightly bent, as if she was carrying more than just the weight of her bag. There was a sadness about her, the kind that comes when life feels heavy but must still move on. Watching her, Toruna remembered that she would be going for Umrah soon, and wondered if she might wear a niqab then too. The thought lingered as she walked on …
Near the park bench, Toruna saw a dead butterfly, its wings still beautiful, though still. She picked it up gently and showed it to her son who looked at it with curiosity, helped her to put it on the height of the side wall!
As they were walking, Toruna observed that two elderly men walked slowly side by side, leaning on their canes and talking as if the world belonged to only them. Their laughter carried softly in the air. Toruna thought about how friendship, even in old age, keeps the heart alive, how sharing stories can make time feel lighter … she wondered what might be the topics of their laughter!
Then, not far from them, a young girl crouched near the edge of the grass, feeding milk and biscuits to a few stray cats. The cats purred and brushed against her legs. Her sweet smile warmed Toruna’s heart, a small act of kindness in a noisy world …
A little further ahead, a young mother struggled with her two small children, one crying, the other running away. Toruna smiled at this sight of this young mother, remembering her own early days of motherhood. How young she had been, and ever since then, how her children had become her entire universe …
She and her son walked side by side, sometimes talking, sometimes silent. These walks had become their little ritual, good for both their minds and hearts …
That evening, they noticed a young boy walking slowly around the park. He looked a bit overweight and tired. Toruna said, ‘I’ve been watching that boy for a while.’ Her son nodded, ‘Yes, he comes here often. I’ve seen him too.’ Toruna felt a sadness for him. ‘I hope he feels better soon,” she said, ‘Life gives everyone some struggle that other people can never understand’ ….
As the sun began to fade, they left the park, stopping by the nearby general store to buy a few things before heading home. Toruna smiled to herself, ‘Tomorrow we’ll come again,” she thought, and surely, the path would have more stories waiting to be found …
#roksanatales
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Have you ever wondered, how many stories pass by us each day, unnoticed?
She no longer fears missing out, for she has learned that what’s meant for her will never pass her by. While the world rushes to chase trends, gatherings, and noise, she finds peace in her own rhythm. Her joy isn’t borrowed from what others are doing, but born from the satisfaction of being present where she is …
She doesn’t measure her life against anyone’s timeline. She knows that every soul blooms in its own season. She would rather miss a hundred fleeting moments than lose the one that truly belongs to her …
For her, the real richness lies not in being everywhere, but in being whole, right where she stands …
#roksanatales
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When was the last time you felt at peace simply by being where you are?
I have a fondness for breaking apart A fascination with the fragile The delicate dance of hearts Walking unsteadily on the edge … In love …
I have a fondness for breaking apart At times it seems Love’s other name is Broken hearts … An echo of longing … A symphony of cracks …
I have a fondness for breaking apart In love, I find A beauty in the fracture, In the spaces … Where light seeps through the wounds Where the raw and the real collide In a blaze of truth and tenderness …
I have a fondness for breaking apart It’s a mosaic of Shattered dreams Pieced together with hope … A courage of feeling The audacity of connection …
I have a fondness For the breaking … For the way love demands vulnerability … For the way it strips us bare … For the way all its flaws are revealed I have a fondness For my unguarded heart Breaking apart …
For in the breaking, We find the depth of love The resilience of the beautiful soul … The beauty of a heart That dares to love Even knowing it might break … That’s how I have a fondness For breaking apart …
On this day, he reflected, “I recall she used to attend her prayers for Jumma day.” …
On this day, she reminisced, “I recall he would probably meet the girl.” …
Today, he worried, “She has been feeling a bit unwell. Will she still be able to go to the mosque for her prayers? Perhaps she should rest today. Will she ever heed my advice?” …
Today, she pondered, “When will he meet the girl? Will it be in the evening? That would be preferable. It’s quite hot outside today; they might not feel comfortable meeting in such humidity. I hope their meeting goes well.” …
Despite feeling unwell again, she went to the mosque for Jumma prayer, then in the evening she prayed for him before falling asleep …
In the evening, he met the girl, and they enjoyed their time together, discussing their future life …
Throughout all this time, they remember their memories, Yet they never announce their presence, Simply flowing directly into their hearts …
#roksanatales
I appreciate your prayers for me.
Tell me if there’s anything else you wish to put in this story ….
…
Gunnen/ dutch (n.) to find happiness in someone else’s happiness because that’s how much you love them …
A self-portrait captured In the window’s reflection … Streets refreshed, cars in repose, As the breeze sweeping by … Your absence is there deep within, Even in the hustle of life … A smile graces my lips in this bustling race Thinking of you …. Contemplating …. Life carries me well forward With an unconditional love for you …
#roksanatales
Agape/ greek (n.) The highest form of love. Selfless, sacrificial and unconditional love; persists no matter the circumstance …
Often these days My thoughts are spreading out to you With too many questions hovering upon me.. Is the heat too intense where you dwell? Are you navigating it with ease? What’s the moisture like in your realm? What’s the humidity level there? I sense the weariness in your words; It seems like a struggle for you; Are you truly alright?
Here, we’re also dealing with scorching heatwaves – Yet, amidst the swelter, my mind wanders to you How do you cope up in this relentless weather? Often these days It crosses my mind …
Do you think of me too, Sometimes?
Do you remember my disdain for humidity, And how it worsens my headaches …. Do you remember my aversion to doctors, Yet now they’re an inevitable part of life?
My heart, already broken by your absence, Feels the toll of days passing … I find myself overthinking, Lost in thoughts of you, Especially in these days, Days of relentless heat, Days of suffocating humidity ….
Though You may never grasp … There’s an essence about you that I can’t shake Even amidst these sweltering heatwaves … A grip on me akin to The greatest tale left untold …
So,
Could you narrate an episode or two from your journey? Could you paint a tale of your eccentric existence? Could you recount an experience For me? To me? In these sweltering heat Amidst the scorching waves there? …
Meanwhile Take care, my dear, Know that I pray for you … In every moment In every humid day and night Of these days ….
Yours truly ^^
#roksanatales
I do drink lots of water in these scorching conditions. I do keep my body cool. Though I hate to use sunscreen, just I avoid sunburn. I do like coconut water a lot. And Nimbu Pani too ☺️. Then I love ice cream too 🤷🏿♀️
I won’t be hesitant to say, ‘It was difficult but I could breathe the day … It’s a hopelessness yet hope found its way … Though I cannot predict if all will be well, But I tried my best, trying to break through the spell …
#roksanatales
It rained a lot today, a lot, a lot, a lot; after a long, long, long time. …. It made me a bit contemplative …. Does this happen with you when it rains?
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Sielvartas/ lithuanian (n.) This term means deep sorrow or ‘soul tumbling’. It can simply be a state of seemingly endless grief …
And came to school the next day and she came to my desk room to see me. She was standing at the doorstep and she called me softly,
‘Miss’ …..
I looked at her, and got up from my desk and went closer to the doorstep and touching her soft cheek, I said,
‘Hello Mumma! How’re you sweety? You were absent yesterday. I heard that you had toothache. How’s your toothache now?
I was saying all these to her at a go …
And she said to me ‘Did you miss me?’ with such deep affectionate look at me and with a softer voice that it almost melted my heart with pure bliss …
It was so heartwarming, I immediately gave her a hug and said, ‘Of course, I missed you dear. I missed you so much.’
It seemed she felt good to hear those words for her and then she hugged me for a few seconds and smiled ….
And then she noticed my buddy taping fingers
‘What happened?’ – serious concerns with full of innocent sympathy
‘It just was an accident my dear.’ I answered.
‘Is this hurting you?’ She couldn’t get it what’s that!
‘Well, yes! A little’ ….
‘How did it happen?’ – asked like an adult as if she would understand the whole situation …
She kissed my buddy taping and asked me, ‘Should I draw something on your bandage? So it’ll be cured faster.’
‘Oh dear! Really? You can draw of course.’
Then she brought out her special colour box and said to me, ‘I want to use the colors that you prefer today. Cause it’s your bandage on your hand.”
Then I chose some colors, pink, purple, green yellow …
She drew this one. She drew a heart, a flower …. For me ….
She asked me, ‘Did you like it?
I know you all know what my answer was to her …
Now you tell me, ‘Do you like this Little Joy’?’
Do you value such little joy in your life?
How sometimes we get someone’s affection and we don’t even notice ….
How sometimes you know that you’re someone special in someone’s heart, and yet you do not care much or ignore or you take that for granted …
How often we do not acknowledge these little joys of life …
Often I do find these ‘Little Joy’ moments in my life and I value them deeply. I believe life is made up of these little moments, precious memories, vulnerability and love that all add up to create a big canvas of your life. We should know that the bigger picture cannot be made without all the small moments that bring it all together. So
‘I hope you find, as I did, that happiness comes from noticing and enjoying the little things in life’
A royal escape with some happy laughter And sometimes some happy tears … Together with you only I’ll go to such escape Again and again, now and always And throughout all the coming years of any age …
Together we’ll visit The Louvre Museum to see Mona Lisa To see her mysterious beauty Her smile is a mirror of me and Like me, the curve of her lips speak wisely … Her eyes have an unspoken love, dear What would she say if she could speak? Darling, if you want to know Then ask me only …..
By the flowing Blue Nile We’ll thread a dream strong The mightier streams will pass it To other mightier throng … We’ll also keep the magic of love By the brilliance shades of Pyramids See, the beautiful Giza is near They say, it’s west of the Nile clear … Will we see Sphinx, Pharaoh’s face? We’ll discover the mysteries of that phase Together
The moon shines brightly upon the Great Wall It’s lying like a great dragon along the sky Three thousand years of wind and rain come by It’s path is natural, strong and magnificent, just like you It’s a long journey on the Great Wall And I’ll be close to you, talking and walking about too …
Let’s get an appointment at the Eiffel Tower As in the ‘Sleepless in Seattle’, You may love it’s rooftop, High, high, very high …. Together from there We’ll make our journey and we’ll fly Screaming to the world, ‘Goodbye’ ….
Taj Mahal, no doubt, we’ll see It’s a sign of eternal love The gardens, the palace The embroidered doors, walls and marbles In all its beauty, a wondrous splendour … But it brightens no brighter, darling As it brightens in your heart’s core ….
We may dive in the Pacific Ocean Its waves are like lustrous strands Inviting us to light the deep with our love … We may sit by it’s beach And listen to the calling of the sea-gulls We’ll find rocks and shells We’ll walk hand in hand Enjoying the ocean’s smell …
It would be excellent To walk a Hollywood Fame … You and me will act the roll As they act in ‘You’ve got Mail’ I’m sure we’ll achieve a glamorous name …
Live orchestra of ‘Love-story’ In Italy, will be a joyful sight The every thought, the music says It says of the wish of a beautiful night …
We’ll ride a New York subway We’ll play hide and seek Station after station We’ll laugh and not fray Our laughter will keep the wind Soothing For others to breathe more and to pray …
Sweetheart, we’ll plant our flowers We’ll see the blue open sky We’ll see watch stars at night And we’ll do something different everyday To be kinder and to be more bright We’ll feed a hungry child With one word of gentle love With one look more smiling to him It’s a divine pleasure It’s never a charity to any other But to ourselves darling, It’ll build our truthful insight, undoubtedly …
A Royal Escape of such happy laughter With some happy tears is a pleasure … As we grow together, with smiles I’ll be escaping with only you To many phases and places Again and again, now and always And through out all the coming years of any age …
#roksanatales
It’s my personal favourite with some error, here and there. And I know it’s a bit long than my usual ones, but I love this long poem and I hope you would love it too to read it all ….
And here I mentioned about Taj Mahal …. Don’t know why I didn’t mention Pahalgam or the BETAAB Valley … Kashmir is my recent favourite place, absolutely, say like forever ♾️ 🥰
So should I include the place in this Royal Escape? Tell me ….
And tell me also where would you escape if there’s any chance of you being able to take such escape …
Roksana Tales 