Raabta/ urdu (n.) inexplicable connection with another soul …
I have been suffering from the viral fever of the season for the last two days and this fever is quite different from what I had experienced before. So yesterday even in my feverish head and body, my mind felt to write something, that went like, ‘The cosmos is within us, the dance is absolutely amazing, let the universe find the questions you have, the answers you need” …. Then may be for a second or two, I felt hallucinations … may be or may be not … sometimes high temperatures do cause such things, right? However, I’m all fine with the fever still going on … So today, when I was going through those yesterday’s musings, I dropped the idea of writing further about the cosmos verses one, and really felt passionate about writing this one …
Raabta
So simple, yet I hope you like it ✨♥️
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Enchanting Kashmir’ has a hypnotic bell that keep ringing in my heart and soul … so you may find a lot of videos and images that I so dearly keep sharing … 😊
She’s truly honest In her honest prayers … Though within her unspeakable despair And impossibility, She couldn’t go away far; But always come back quite inevitably …
All frailties alone cast upon Her feeble hope that always exits; Her nature reigns upon her own soul … She holds on to her faith; yet so unfair her torments, Make the despair ever greater Widening her tears itself betwixt, She watches feebly all souls’ cruel wits …
Impossibility goes not to heaven Like a weak and an easy prey; Thinking is not same as knowing, So at her best, she spends in praying, Trusting each and everyday. At times, she tries to cease time But not her endless pray ….
(Whatever you wish: You know that you know But know you not; Truth is her lord And always you shall be; ‘My dear, (she whispers) I’ll serve what you deserve, Even if you talk So ungratefully. :Whenever you wish)
The injustice rankles yet More often loving comes to her aid. It is always worth keeping, Her emotion that rises and trips away springs; For the sake of her truth, she brings The words that breathe a reason Scaring the unfinished conversation even with self …
Though her skies are too dark (at the moment) With flowers in odor and in hue in sight, Now she excludes all and wanders through the night … Being more calm and bright, Letting all her doubts, thoughts and emotions pass by To enter the heaven, the endless light,
Lastly, she takes her flight.
So long, she loved at her best, A bittersweet farewell to her dear is the rest … She writes her last inscription just to let you in, ‘Please don’t hurt my soulful prayers, Forgive my selfish tears …. As I would take rebirth in this world, With my passion for you Deep, and fully blooming And quivers with bliss.’
Above, a bit complex verses, though I think it’s fine …
In a poem I usually use whatever can be called the melody long before I have reached an understanding of all that it might mean. Sometimes I think I can use that to my hearts’ fullness and other time I feel that it’s unfinished yet again conveying the emotions which convince me to love it as it is … To me, poetry attracts when only emotions endures ….
Querencia / Spanish /kɛˈrɛnθɪə, Spanish keˈrenθja, keˈrensja/ (adj.) a place where one feels safe, a place where one feels at home …
Just thought to add an audio of these verses. Excuse my terrible voice and poor sound effects🙏 I took quite a few attempts for this and lastly I thought, ‘Okay, let it be.’ 🤷🏿♀️
I know you all are kind, compassionate and thoughtful.
Dear Art lovers, Please visit my precious art gallery sometimes And get an overwhelming experience … Stare at my artworks for sometime … Sometimes, stare at my precious artwork for some more time, say, five minutes more or ten minutes longer … Stare at it, as if you do not have any hurry or hustle …
During that period of time You may feel that time is moving slow around you and you’re still in front of an artwork … An artwork by Roksana Amelia Suppose, it’s her ‘Journey All its Own’ …. Just I wish You would love this slow looking at her artwork for a bit longer time … As it is surely a ‘Journey All its Own’ ….
We all want to know a bit about ourselves .. Don’t we? We think we know a lot about ourselves .. Do we? You know about ‘Know thyself’ – it’s a famous saying … But did you ever wonder why it’s a bit difficult to know thyself? Have we looked deep down into our soul for a bit longer time? Do we take a bit longer dive into our soul? Are we comfortable enough to take the journey into our soul a bit longer time? Or do we feel restless resting in our own soul? Knowing thyself isn’t so easy, my dear … Learn the art of slow looking at your own self Knowing thyself is an art of learning through observation … To know thyself needs uninterrupted attention; So take time, dive deep and see your soul through your heart and mind ….
So when you visit my gallery You may reward a longer look at the precious artworks here …. Thus you may spend time with the precious journey that you own as well …
This ‘Journey All its Own’ is yours and yours only … I won’t say how you should look at it. It’s personal. You decide what you wish to look and what you feel about it … It’s about you and this ‘Journey’ …
I just feel happy that While you’re with my artwork, You may make your own discoveries out of your slow looking at it … As if you are diving deep and deep And forming a very special personal connection with it …
See my dear, I’m more interested about This special connection between you and my precious art piece, Specifically because ….. I so long to wish for that beautiful sight of You and your ‘Journey All Its Own’ ….
A New Journey All Its own …
And now tell me, which one/s you feel more connected to your own soul … what specific things would drive you to know yourself better …. Have you ever thought about it?
Some days I like to walk with a book…. And with that, there are some words to reflect..
Don’t go back to past. There’s nothing you can do about it. Accept where you’re at and move on and try be in the present. Have gratitude for what you already have. Have compassion and accept what is. And if you can change it, it’s okay. But there are somethings that you need to accept that you can’t change And if you can’t change, let it go. Be who you’re and people will like you.
A grief is a grief is a grief, and there’s not a piece of me that believes one loss is greater than another…Everyone’s loss is greater in their life. Try to understand this and be empathetic about it. So in a world where you can be anything, be kind.
Time is the finest gift one can give to other from heart and soul. Empathy is the truest attribute one can possess for others.
Just “Don’t ever give anybody enough power to bring back the triggered unhealed version of you, when you’ve worked so hard to become better than that” ….
My heart is full of many things to say to you But I feel speech is nothing to you at all …
I believe We shall surely see each other someday Though I’m afraid I wouldn’t deliver the observations So far I’ve made …. The emotions that’s touching me these days, In moments so weird ….
I believe Love is an act of forgiveness A tender look that may become So sad But what do I do out of it? My tender look is my Strange habit ….
I believe My undefined patience And the passion of my angels Give me much relief Cause I know you … Although you show your indifference But I bet it’s only out of love, Not hate …
Then suddenly I get this bittersweet feeling of onsra, that whatever little we have is coming to a close
My heart is full of many things to say to you But I feel speech is nothing to you at all
I’m in love with the scenic beauty of the Himalayan Mountains in the backdrop ….and I have never been to any snow-clad mountains up so close. It was a surrealistic feeling for me. I visited Srinagar, Gulmarg, Pahalgam, Sonamarg, Anantnag. I was excited for Gulmarg Gondola, the world’s second longest & second highest cable car 14,000 above sea level with picturesque views. Gondola ride takes around 22 minutes to reach Mountain Apharwat Peak from Gulmarg town and it is worth every minute to visit the peak. Exceptional views of sky and clouds. I was mesmerised by the wonderful view of the magnificent snow clad peaks. I loved the activities that I did, hiking, skiing ⛷️, sleighing. Had yummy coffee and Maggie soup there up on that mountain peak. So interesting!
Apart from Gulmarg Gondola and peak of the Apharwat mountain attractions, I loved Betaab Valley, Pahalgam valley, Dal lake, Zoji La, Baltal, Indira Gandhi Memorial Tulip Garden, Pari Mahal, Night staying on a houseboat and Shikara ride in the fabulous Dal Lake, Horse riding to go to Baisaran Valley – each and everywhere I went, I can write a whole lot of things – but that story I may share later, some other day …
Here let me tell you about how destiny took me to Kashmir ….
I was planning an India trip with close ones. Initially we planned to visit the famous Taj Mahal in Agra, then Jaipur, Delhi also. But there were some situation which made me plan for Kolkata with another school friend. We bought the tickets even. But then again I had to rethink my trip and cancelled the air ticket. Then two of my colleagues wanted to join me for Darjeeling. Again we were making a bit research on this to make a good itinerary for us three. Then that plan also got cancelled. And I was the only one left to make the trip to India. But the timing wasn’t preferable for some reason and I wanted to avoid few particular dates specifically for my youngest sister was coming after months. Then I was in dilemma also, cause I didn’t want to make the trip alone. My family didn’t have any visa. Now I had only few days left to make the trip happen. Lastly within two days I tagged myself with some girls whom I didn’t know and they were going to Kashmir and that again they planned on the days when my sister was coming. With a bit of mixed emotions about not being able to spend time with my chhotu sister, I decided to join that group of girls. So finally I was going to take that solo trip with them whom I never met and they happened to be my travel companions for seven days.
The moment I flew for Kashmir’s, I was terribly missing my family, and sisters back home. And then the moment I landed in one of the Heaven on Earth, I was spellbound by the stars and universe joined in with its magic wand upon me to make me this much enchanted 🤩 🪄….
That’s why if someone asks me, ‘Is Kashmir worth it?”, I would say, ‘You never know until you visit.’
May be Kashmir was destined for me in many layers of undefined ways of life – that story I wish to share some other day ….
I took a lot of pictures and videos. I’m sharing only few here. Let me know if you have liked the Paradise Picturesque photographs by Roksana Tales. I wish to make post cards with some of the moments there.
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I wish to visit again … Will you go with me?
And
I’m an Orophile, meaning I’m a person who loves mountains …
In-Yun / korean / (n.) The ties between people over the course of their lives, and the belief that we meet certain people because we had interactions with them in thousands of past lives …
It’s a word in Korean, In-Yun, it means fate. But it’s specifically about relationships between people. It’s an In-Yun, if two strangers even walk by each other in the street, and their clothes accidentally brush. Because it means there must have been something between them in their past lives. If two people get married, they say it’s because there have been 8,000 layers of In-Yun over 8,000 lifetimes ….
Commuovere (Italian) /ko’mːwɔvere/ (v.) this word means you’ve been moved or touched or had your heart warmed, by someone. Specifically, it’s a story that has stirred your heart or moved you to tears …
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Sometimes I do feel a bit of strange when I find my mind chooses the words that tread the hazy line between romance, or emotions of two potential lovers or just someone who I may have met somewhere, in my imagination or real, or virtually, or anywhere in the universe, … then I feel that while writing it’s not necessarily solely about me all the time and it’s not what it seems as well and it’s just something that makes me feel happy when I can express certain feelings as it comes within; Often I know, through these words, I simply may portray someone else’s longing, or devotion, or heartbreaking phase, or someone who might be seeking solace from the world of separation, or someone who makes his love stronger even when it’s over … or just about me trying to find the right words to describe an indescribable feeling within ….
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Felt a quite chaos while painting it, so I named it CHAOS
So I went to a bit far away village for a simple photo-walk. There I met some extraordinary people of all ages who welcomed me wholeheartedly. But they do not know me. I do not know them until today … Some love their goats, some love their fields, some love their busy time – and all were happy and contented. I just love that so much. The simplicity. The care they carry for a stranger is nothing but the glory of their life.
I felt so much warm around them. Few children of that village accompanied me all the time … wherever I was going they were always there …
I took a lot of pictures. Here I have shared only a few. When I get a scope of taking pictures, I go crazy. I even do not remember from when I get this attraction to take photos wherever I would go or wherever I would be … I simply love when I hear my camera makes the sound, ‘Click Click’. I feel so passionate about it! Between smiles, laughter, and capturing memories, who wouldn’t just love photography?
I’m sure photography tells a story. You can see these photographs and make the story for yourself …
Will you?
For a little walk With me, Will you please come? A little far away From chaos and bustle Of city life Will you please come? For a little walk Down the valley With a tune of a song That you like and I love too … Will you please come?
The girls were always by my side. wherever I was going, they were there too—–was feeling special, and so loved. Thank you so much for the lovely afternoon———-They were waving goodbyes to me
Sometimes somehow I feel funny writing all these letters of love. Then sometimes somehow I know somewhere someone may resonate all of my these simple, plain and quite undecorated letters of love for themselves … And then all the time I know that the letters of love may differ from person to person, but the in-depth feelings of love remain the same…
You are lingering Over my head like rain clouds … When will you fall like rain in my heart?
But wait … Not now … Not yet ……
Ever since I’ve acknowledged this f e e l ing Interestingly, I have felt less alone …
There are still some lingering doubts in my mind; though My journey into this has been very unplanned So practicing the pause and silence would probably work, telling myself … And the rain clouds are hovering over me …. Hence taking pause has become easy silently, and solitarily …
As if I’m in love with the bliss of solitude … These rain-clouds are lingering over my head And I’m looking at it from the bright side That they are with me means to me As if You’re with me!
So, wait .… Not now … Not yet …..
Fall like rain in my heart After sometime, after some pauses … Rain in my heart for no reason Let the clouds part, doubts be gone, Fall in love with me … Like a soft, whispering breeze while it rains Only after sometime, after some pauses …
Why is prayer so powerful? It’s because you’re having a conversation with the lord of the universe With the being who gives life Who is the light of the heavens and the earth And you’re not just talking to someone who loves you You’re talking to someone who’s the source of all love and all goodness And prayer doesn’t end what you say to God or what you ask from God …
When you get connected to the source of all positivity Something inside you also changes You get fulfilled You get inspired And most of all you get peace
Wanted to meet you wearing my white Kanchipuram saree in front of Taj Mahal …
Now you’re coming to the hospital To see me …
It would be quite an unexpected sight … But my heart is pounding at the very thought of it …
– Hello, are you okay? – Yes, I’m okay. – I’m sorry. – Why are you sorry? There’s nothing you could’ve done. It was supposed to happen the way I was so clumsy on the road – Why were you … – Umm. I’m sorry …
I couldn’t tell him, my heart was restless at the very thought of meeting him for the first time ever … So I was a bit unmindful and acted clumsily, and silly on the road and there the accident happened in the middle of the midnight …
– Hey, don’t worry. You’ll be fine. I’m coming to you.
Instantly there’s this faster beating of my heart at the very sound of him saying, ‘I’m coming to you.’
I wanted to meet you wearing my very traditional Kanchipuram white saree. It’s as elegant as Taj. I feel gorgeous in it. I have been keeping it aside the day we planned to meet in front of Taj.
Now you are coming to the hospital and I m wearing this dull hospital gown! How ironic is that ….. !
Oh, no! I think I could see him. That’s got to be him … How am I sure! Why not … I have seen him so Many times in my dreams … I know how he walks, how he looks, how he would talk to me …
Oh no! I dreamt of conversation over coffee with him … Now? What will I have with him? Or is he bringing soup and fruits for a patient (that’s me)? Unfortunately ….
He’s looking here and there … Not sure of the direction, I guess … Should I call him? Tell him to come straight over here … I’m just behind this long glass door and Precisely just follow the directions from where faster loud heartbeats are coming… That’s mine How can I manage my heart palpitations? I can hear it… It’s unmanageable …
Now, yes he’s near and has found me … Waving his hand in a friendly smiling manner … I’m just feeling shy even to wave back a little bit … As if I have become all still! My heart is beating so fast And I do not want him to see me like this … Nervous and blushing Hey, but I’m sick … My heart rate can be high And I can blush a bit Fortunately ….
There’s this beating in my heart, and It sounds like you … You told me when you would meet me, You’ll recite my favourite poem, and that’s The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock “Let us go then, you and I, When the evening is spread out against the sky” Now you won’t be reciting the poem … Now you’ll just sit in front of my hospital bed And talk this or that … As if I would be in pain listening to your recitation, you would think … But trust me, I won’t be in pain To listen to you … Now I don’t know if you can hear me properly Cause at the back of my mind, I’m hearing you reciting, ‘Let us go then, you and I’ … I also feel to just leave this place You and I …
How boring this place is For two strangers to meet for the first time …
– Hey, finally, I’m able to see you. How are you now? (Your thoughtful words for me) – I’m just fine. The doctor said I can leave by 3 pm … – Really? That’s awesome then. It’s already 1 pm. Should we finalize the papers and payments etc? – Oh! Don’t worry! That’s already done. I just can wrap up all the papers and medicines. – Where’s your lugguge? – There’s a locker for the patients without attendance. So they kept those there. My hotel pickup car will soon arrive … – What? No ways! I’ve my car and you’re coming with me. I may drop you there. You’ll finish the checked in at your hotel and then take some time to freshen up. Then we’ll go for an early dinner, I mean if you would feel fine. Or we can meet tomorrow again. Don’t worry.
While he was saying all these words there, I was thinking all in my mind, ‘Then I’ll wear my white Kanchipuram saree for the dinner with him which I wanted to wear to meet him for the first time in front of Taj Mahal.’
He saw my blank look and suddenly I heard him asking, – Don’t you trust me?
There my heartbeat paused for a bit and I told him, – I trust you. – Did you listen what I said? – Yes, I did … – Good. So all’s settled then…
Finally we’re getting into cozy conversation… A quiet conversation Dwelling In the eternal love …
A simple prayer Powerful enough ‘You deserve happy’ …
You think you can stop loving someone, But in reality You can only hide that feeling, You never stop loving … Because once you love someone, There’s no undoing it … There’s only prayers of Happiness for them …
You are like a music Which creates melancholic moods inside my heart … A melody that lingers, night and day … I take time to listen to it, I find myself enchanted; When nothing seems to ease my restlessness I listen to you, my music To walk the long journey of life Even though it only creates melancholic moods But you are like that music to me Loving, healing, heart-touching Connecting my soul to you Forever and always ….
The paths and the valleys are glowing There is magic in mountains and waterfalls The air is reciting the story of our love ….
There I felt shy when you came near to me The breeze could hear the breaths of my silent shyness … but I couldn’t …
Here My unheard songs are echoing across the mountains Even though I’m feeling a bit lonely Without you …. Yet this loneliness has a fragrance of you Our love has hopes for tomorrow This distance looks good to me …
The paths and the valleys are glowing There is magic in mountains and waterfalls The air is reciting the story of our love ….
I put my heart and soul into my work, and I have lost my mind in the process. -Vincent Willem Van Gogh
It is true for each of my creative works. My paintings have its stories and often they echo my deep-rooted emotions and deep talk with myself. I live in each of its stories and moments of creativity.
So here I so very wish to share my stories of two paintings with you all.
A Tale of Twin Paintings
Finally Falguni has the other twin painting tittle ‘Hope Shines’. I am super happy that she has chosen this one. And then there the first twin painting titled ‘Follow the Soothing Breeze, Here’ already owned by my daughter …
Why am I saying this two paintings as ‘TWIN PAINTINGS’?
Because I painted this two paintings simultaneously, keeping them side by side using only one art paper, dividing them with masking tapes. And they both have the same wavelengths I felt at the time I was painting them. While I was working on this Twins, during their creative process, colouring, taking pauses, brushing, re-brushing, stroking the brushes here and there, I remember I was contemplating on various things, specially doing meaningful purposeful work for the rest of my life. A purpose greater than life itself. Many a times I felt discouraged and demotivated, but never ever I felt lost as to what next. I’ve been always having different ideas to move forward in life. Never look back what I couldn’t, but moving forward what I can. Just like the titles of the Twin Paintings, I have been following a Soothing Breeze instilled in my heart all my life keeping my ‘Hope’ Shines throughout this life’s journey so far ….
Amazing, na?
Now I’m so glad that one twin painting is with my little sister-friend Falguni, and the other twin has its permanent residence at my dear daughter’s far away homesweethome.
When I first shared the two paintings after seemingly finishing them with my daughter, she immediately asked me to keep the ‘Follow the Soothing Breeze Here’ painting for her. I just loved the urgency to book the painting for herself. So I did keep it aside for her, happily. Last time I visited NY, I took that painting for her home there. She has already few of my paintings at her home. Now all the people come to visit her place, they ask her about the paintings and she feels so proud to let them know, ‘My mom is an artist. These are her paintings.’ She has been my very own cheerleader from the day I started the painting journey in 2020. And from then onwards, I listened to her many suggestions for my Jian Bird Creates and my painting journey. She absolutely adores my creative style of living and specially this journey inspires her to follow the soothing breeze deep inside her loving beautiful heart for herself.
Now ‘Hope Shines’ had lost its Twin and was alone, passing its days with other dazzling paintings around it. One day Falguni came at my Fund raising event ‘Meet & Greet’ for love and light. She walked through my small Jian Bird Gallery, and there she found her ‘Hope Shines’. As definitely always her hope shines through all the ups and downs of life’s tragic and unexpected happenings and yet she continues to shine ✨ For that reason or some other, she decided to own the ‘Hope Shines’ …
For an artist, the canvas is his life, breath and philosophy. So when someone owns their artwork or creative piece, and genuinely wants to keep those with them, I as an artist consider it as honor. I feel they can relate to the piece as I do. And for most of my artworks, I had this conversational experience to tell a story or to evoke an emotion. And there are some who wants me to attach the story with it. I feel it’s a complete connection, from soul to soul.
Now I know my very first TWIN paintings will always remain as their beloved treasures at their soul-home wherever they go. They are themselves two amazing souls in the beautiful Earth, self-made, selfless and strong.
Lastly, I just want to say to ALL of you; Never forget. Hope shines only for those who believe.
Thanks, kindly, for stopping by and reading this long note from me.
Roksana Tales 