When a Song Remembers Her

If someone listens to a song
And she appears in the verse
Not summoned, not expected
Just felt, like a breeze through a half-open window
Then that is love in its gentlest form …

Not loud, not declared
But tucked between notes
Where memory breathes, and the heart still knows
What it never forgot …

And if they play it again
Not to relive the past
But to feel her near
Just once more …

Alas, the song fades!
But somewhere in its echo
lives a moment
They never said goodbye to …

#roksanatales

Regent’s Park, London

I was listening to a song when a sudden thought settled in, if someone ever hears a song and thinks of me, isn’t that one of the most deeply emotional and sacred gestures?

That moment stayed with me, and I ended up writing ‘When a Song Remembers Her’ … It doesn’t follow any structure or rhyme, but it holds something personal, love, memory, longing …

Maybe it’s a poem. Maybe it’s just a feeling shaped into words. I’m not entirely sure …

But I wonder, what do you think, can something like this be called a poem? Or does a poem need rules to be real, or can it simply be a moment that moves us?

Also, I’m just wondering about you, have you ever heard a song and found someone gently returning to your heart through it?

Tell me,
Isn’t it beautiful how music remembers what we try to forget?

I♥️

Between Valleys and Dreams

When R stepped off the small plane that landed in Paro, Bhutan, she felt something shift, not dramatically, but like the settling of dust after a long journey …

The valley stretched wide beneath her, green and golden in patches, framed by distant, unmoving mountains. It was quieter than she expected. Even the wind seemed to move gently, as though not to disturb the stillness that held this place together …

She had arrived not as a tourist, but as a teacher, a woman in her late thirties from Bangladesh, with a degree in English and a quiet but persistent belief in meaningful work. Years ago, it had been just a passing dream, one that took root on a monsoon evening back home, when her father handed her a book after returning from a short business trip to Bhutan: Married to Bhutan by Linda Leaming. She didn’t know then that the book would become more than a gift. It would become a roadmap …

She read it in one sitting, and then again, slower. The words painted a life far from the chaos she knew: one of rhythm, simplicity, joy without extravagance. Something about it stirred her. Not just the country itself, but the idea that a person could choose a gentler life, one rooted in intention. Ever since, the desire to live and work in Bhutan stayed with her, not loudly, but like a thread running through her decisions, pulling her quietly in one direction …

It took years to make it happen. Teaching jobs weren’t easy to come by. There were rejections, delays, moments of self-doubt. But eventually, things aligned. A school in Paro welcomed her. And so she came, with a suitcase full of essentials and a heart full of the unknown …

The school was modest: a few classrooms, basic supplies, and a staff of deeply committed educators. Her students were bright-eyed and curious, some from the surrounding hills, others from the valley towns. They called her Miss R with respect and affection. She taught English, but often, she felt she was learning more than she was giving …

In Paro, life had a slower pulse. Mornings began with mist hanging low over the rice fields. The walk to school was lined with prayer flags and the occasional passing cow. She started wearing the kira on school days, awkwardly at first, then with growing comfort. Suja, salted butter tea, became something she reached for on chilly afternoons …

She missed home sometimes: the sound of the call to prayer, her mother’s cooking, the overlapping laughter of cousins. But Bhutan had offered her something she hadn’t expected, a deep and gentle space to grow. Here, her work felt rooted. Each lesson she planned, each conversation with a student, each moment of solitude looking out at the hills, it all added up to a life that felt fuller, simpler, and strangely her own …

Some evenings, when the rain returned and wrapped the mountains in silver, she would pull out the old book her father had given her. The pages were worn now, the cover faded. But the feeling it gave her, that tug toward a life of simplicity and purpose, still felt as clear as it did all those years ago …

Living in Bhutan hadn’t made her someone new. It had returned her to someone she had always hoped to be: grounded, purposeful, and joyful. She wasn’t searching anymore. She was, finally, living the life she had once only read about …

She is here …
Teaching …
Living near the mountain valleys she once only imagined …
And in doing so, she has become a part of a beautiful story …

And at the end of each day, amidst mountain valleys, in the hush of Paro’s twilight, that felt like enough …

While there in Bhutan

Bhutan has a sacred place in my heart. I visited once, and it felt like stepping into a world where everything slows down. Peace seemed to rise gently with the mountains …

I remember the kind people, the prayer flags fluttering in the wind, and the quiet beauty of the dzongs. Everything left a deep impression on me …

Rafting was one of the most exciting parts, unexpectedly wild, joyful, and full of laughter. That whole trip was truly an adventure I’ll never forget …

Before leaving, I bought the book Married to Bhutan from Paro International Airport. After reading it, something in me shifted. It changed the way I see life, more simply, more mindfully, and with a greater sense of purpose

I hope to return to Bhutan again and again

Musing

Out of life’s deepest tragedies often rise the wisest truths : pain becomes the teacher, and time, the witness …

Yūgen

Now the evening descends in stillness
And the burdens of the day return to the hands of the Divine
He knows what the heart held in silence
And wraps the soul in mercy, soft as dusk …

#roksanatales

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Recently I happen to read a haiku by Bashō:
Such stillness
the cicada’s cry drills deep
into the rocks.

It stayed with me. The depth, it felt like something more than words. That’s when I found the Japanese word Yūgen. It means a deep, mysterious beauty that can’t be fully explained. It felt just right for what I was feeling, so I kept it with me, as the title for something I’m slowly shaping in my heart …

Yūgen (幽玄)
A deep, mysterious sense of beauty and the grace of the universe, often felt during twilight or in quiet moments

Silent Moves

Build, love, and strive in silence. Then arrive with grace, not noise; after all, why reveal your next move when the final one will speak for itself!

Are you guarding your vision or giving it away too soon?

Reflect and focus on your vision …

Truth is, I Miss You

Your absence hums like a violin string snapped mid-note
A comet that vanished before its trail could unfold
The eclipse of a lighthouse on a storm-battered coast …

Time crawls, a spider weaving webs of empty hours
Memories linger like fireflies trapped in a jar
Each one dimming, yet refusing to fade into stars …

Your voice was rain stitching needles through thirsty leaves
Now silence looms like an unfinished symphony’s grief
A mosaic missing its most vivid, sacred piece…

I search for you in the scent of forgotten gardens
In waves that speak like poets lost to their stanzas
In winds that carry secrets of unuttered mantras …

Truth is, I miss you like the moon misses its tides
A ship adrift, no constellations to confide
The ache of a heart where all its echoes reside

I♥️

C’est la vie

My Dear,
It’s likely that as you were writing to me, I was walking back home from work, taking in the beauty of the flowers in my charming neighborhood …

I adore my neighborhood. The scenery is incredibly captivating with its tall trees and beautiful blossoming flowers. I frequently opt to walk home from work, as it’s only 850-1000 steps from my workplace to my home …

So, what I was saying about my neighborhood!

I really admire the shade under the tall trees and enjoy watching the breeze rustle through the colorful bougainvillea. It’s lovely to see people walking along the footpath and enjoying their time. As I passed by the mosque, I noticed people seeking relief from the scorching heat under the trees in front of the mosque. I adore the vibrant colors, the fragrant scents, and the sense of simplicity in that scene.

It was scorching heat outside. And there I found myself embracing the warmth of the surroundings. There was refreshing cool breeze and thoughts of you. It may sound unbelievable, but it’s the truth. Your presence in my thoughts remains unwavering amidst the whirlwind of life’s events. Please, believe that.

So, where was I? I was expressing my fondness for the delightful, blossoming, shady path in my neighborhood and how much I’m fond of you …

Today I took a break from work as I was feeling an intermittent cramping in my abdomen. Some rest will help me feel better. However,. Sudden leave from work leads me to think, “How can I best utilize this extra time at home?” Swiftly, I begin mentally compiling a to-do list. Eventually, I decided to walk back home…

While returning, I found myself feeling happy to see these blossoms and greens. The outside heat was too strong but I cared less and I continued walking, intermittently pausing to capture photographs.

I returned home and checked my email once again. I was so surprised to receive your mail. This news brightened my day so much that now I feel inspired to spend the next few hours painting.

I find great pleasure in painting when my heart is filled with happiness and I was very happy to read your mail. 

Your words and painting will grace my own solitude for today, now and here. 

Do you enjoy solitude?

I eagerly await your response to my somewhat poetic emails.

Have a peaceful, wonderful, blissful day!

Yours truly,
^^

Do you enjoy solitude?

C’est la vie means ‘That’s life’ 😊

Immersed

There once was a curious soul
Wondering how your days roll
What activities fill your time …
It’s something she often wonders about …
Completely immersed in the moment

When I’m happy, either I sing or I paint. when I’m very happy I do both 😊

What do you do when you’re happy or very happy?

A Letter to Beloved

Can you perceive
An unseen bond between us?
It ties us together; trust it, my love …
It’s invisible, yet unmistakably sensed
Certainly by me …
Do you not sense it as well?
A connection surpassing time and distance…
Ours is an endless bond
Our eternal, cherished blessing …

Through moments fleeting and forever
The thread weaves its way …
Stretching, sometimes tangling,
Yet resilient, unyielding …
As time, as it is infinite, it will stay …

Oh, my beloved, my dear …
Please pardon me, the mistake was mine
Throughout the moments we shared
And the clarity we’ve known …
It took me a while
To fully understand your essence …

Now I know
This love endures, and
Time, place, circumstance may shift,
This love is unbroken, my constant uplift …

Cherish caring hearts; love’s true wealth …

I’m uncertain if the title fits these verses. Do you have a suggestion?

^^

Wanderer

His presence lingers always
In thoughts, he resides …

When will I be able to let go of the enchanting pull of Kashmir, with its grand mountains and stunning scenery? I believe I’m entirely in love with it.

Discovering happiness and serenity along the path and journey ….

Have you ever visited a place that lingers in your mind long after you’ve left?

Let Silence Reigns

Let silence reigns…
Afterwards let words flow freely, endlessly through us, like a gentle stream ….

Let certain words remain unsaid …
Let some words remain unheard …
Let silence reigns …

For if all is voiced
What remains in the silence?
For if all is listened
What remains in the voice?

Let blank pages be as it is
For me and you, for the time being or for long, long time …

Let silence reigns …

Afterwards let words flow freely, endlessly through us, like a gentle stream, unbound, serene and graceful ….

A Delusion

Most days, when it’s Friday, I remember that on such one Friday I entered his city, and he didn’t show up …

Do you know what I was thinking when I stepped out of the airport? I never been to this airport and unfortunately I was going to stay only the night at his city ….

Our hotel cars were outside the airport. We girls got into the cars and the car was passing through the airport road to get to the city centre … the full moon was racing with us, I was watching it through the car window …with my wandering heartbeats on …

I wanted to believe that he will be there to surprise me. So without any contact with him, I was still hoping that I may see him in there at the hotel lobby and for that I was feeling a bit nervous, ‘What if he actually comes!? Should I go outside to grab coffee with him as he wanted to take me out for a coffee, or should I ask him to have dinner at the hotel restaurant as it was already late because of the delayed flight. We won’t get time for a coffee break somewhere else.’ – to be honest I was feeling very nervous too. And more importantly, I needed to give him the gifts that I’ve been carrying throughout my whole trip,… So I needed to unpack my luggage!”

“Oh no! That would be a mess!” – I was thinking about all these in my mind …

Then we reached the hotel. The lobby was normal with less people. I looked around a little bit more. “Was there any face that was searching someone?” – I was looking here and there and was thinking about this – “Oh! better if he doesn’t come now.” As if I can recognise him. I never saw him even. How stupid and pathetic I was! I was thinking, ‘I want to freshen up first and then I’ll be coming down again for dinner, and may be by that time he would come and I may offer him dinner Dosa at the hotel restaurant’ … I still can’t believe that I was thinking all of these even without any confirmation from him to meet me here! Feeling too much angry at myself ….

However, after the hotel formalities were done, we went up to our room and then I came down with my travel mate and by that time I grew a feeling of no expectation that he would come. ‘If I expect, it’s going to hurt me. It’s alright’ – I was thinking to make myself feel better and now I’m waiting for my dosa with an expectation of having a good dinner, because I was so hungry by that time through so many things and all of these unsure traumas …

Unfortunately 
-A delayed flight disappointed me …
-‘He’ disappointed me (He didn’t come. He didn’t confirm he would come though. Still I felt disappointed as if it’s all his fault…. )
-Dosa disappointed me (I was so hungry and I was craving dosa, but it was a disaster)

Now what? 

A dilemma …

To keep or not to keep the gift packet at the reception desk!

My poor little handmade gifts for him, and few other things – should I keep my gift packet for him to pick later on when he gets to know that I was at his city and about all of these!

Poor me and my surprise gifts!

Wish he would know how brave it was for me to accept his coffee date for sometime in the middle of the night …

It won’t make sense if he never comes and by that time I started having headaches. I must sleep for sometime, and so I did, having a medicine …

It was 3 AM in the morning, again our cars were on the road of his city to reach the airport. This time I took some videos of the road as a memory of the city. 

Long ago when the young girl in me visited this city, she was a carefree young girl who didnt know what does disappointment means! At that time she treasured the memory of visiting the famous amusement park with her siblings – it was full of fun, laughter and pure innocent joy. That time she left the city with delightful memories. 

Now she’s leaving the city with the gift she so lovingly brought here for someone she never met before, but whom she thought she knew for a long time ….

This time she was innocent too, as her feelings were so deep and true, but she didn’t understand why she would be disappointed for someone who didn’t even know about the gifts she’s been carrying for him.

But for what reason, she was upset – she didn’t understand though she’s not a carefree young girl anymore …

But she was upset, confused and disoriented because now she was carrying the gifts to bring back home and carrying a strange unknown heart leaving a bit of her heart in this dark city! 

Dark, because she entered it with a strange unknown feeling and it was nighttime though the moon was there (a relief to my eyes) and dark, because her heart was broken for a completely unknown, strange, unspecified reason so she was in denial for long …

It was a Friday night entering his city and on the morning of Saturday my flight took off from his city …

So on Fridays, most times it reminds me of 
that Friday when I was in his city, and he didn’t show up …

A delusion!

It’s a long post. I’m sorry for that. If you’ve read the whole story, thank you and tell me if you’ve ever felt the same? Or any instance that you might have felt ….

Heimweh

Echoes of your absence linger
In the winds of change; …
These days! ….

My heart aches
Unknowingly and why do
‘I miss you’? – I strangely sigh
These days! ….

Heimweh/ german
(n.) a longing for home

Serendipity

Can I sit with you without any words just for a while?

Serendipity/ english. ser·en·dip·i·ty ˌser-ən-ˈdip-ət-ē :
(n.) finding something beautiful without looking for it …

Serendipity in love signifies the magic of unplanned moments and the joy of discovering a special connection where you least expect it

Javaphile

Coffee rings tell tales of art,
Creativity …

Javaphile
(n.) someone who loves coffee

A Few Words

Lovers’ shadows blend,
Whispers in the moonlit night,
Embrace painted stars …

A Royal Escape

A royal escape with some happy laughter
And sometimes some happy tears …
Together with you only I’ll go to such escape
Again and again, now and always
And throughout all the coming years of any age …

Together we’ll visit
The Louvre Museum to see Mona Lisa
To see her mysterious beauty
Her smile is a mirror of me and
Like me, the curve of her lips speak wisely …
Her eyes have an unspoken love, dear
What would she say if she could speak?
Darling, if you want to know
Then ask me only …..

By the flowing Blue Nile
We’ll thread a dream strong
The mightier streams will pass it
To other mightier throng …
We’ll also keep the magic of love
By the brilliance shades of Pyramids
See, the beautiful Giza is near
They say, it’s west of the Nile clear …
Will we see Sphinx, Pharaoh’s face?
We’ll discover the mysteries of that phase
Together

The moon shines brightly upon the Great Wall
It’s lying like a great dragon along the sky
Three thousand years of wind and rain come by
It’s path is natural, strong and magnificent, just like you
It’s a long journey on the Great Wall
And I’ll be close to you, talking and walking about too …

Let’s get an appointment at the Eiffel Tower
As in the ‘Sleepless in Seattle’,
You may love it’s rooftop,
High, high, very high ….
Together from there
We’ll make our journey and we’ll fly
Screaming to the world, ‘Goodbye’ ….

Taj Mahal, no doubt, we’ll see
It’s a sign of eternal love
The gardens, the palace
The embroidered doors, walls and marbles
In all its beauty, a wondrous splendour …
But it brightens no brighter, darling
As it brightens in your heart’s core ….

We may dive in the Pacific Ocean
Its waves are like lustrous strands
Inviting us to light the deep with our love …
We may sit by it’s beach
And listen to the calling of the sea-gulls
We’ll find rocks and shells
We’ll walk hand in hand
Enjoying the ocean’s smell …

It would be excellent
To walk a Hollywood Fame …
You and me will act the roll
As they act in ‘You’ve got Mail’
I’m sure we’ll achieve a glamorous name …

Live orchestra of ‘Love-story’
In Italy, will be a joyful sight
The every thought, the music says
It says of the wish of a beautiful night …

We’ll ride a New York subway
We’ll play hide and seek
Station after station
We’ll laugh and not fray
Our laughter will keep the wind
Soothing
For others to breathe more and to pray …

Sweetheart, we’ll plant our flowers
We’ll see the blue open sky
We’ll see watch stars at night
And we’ll do something different everyday
To be kinder and to be more bright
We’ll feed a hungry child
With one word of gentle love
With one look more smiling to him
It’s a divine pleasure
It’s never a charity to any other
But to ourselves darling,
It’ll build our truthful insight, undoubtedly …

A Royal Escape of such happy laughter
With some happy tears is a pleasure …
As we grow together, with smiles
I’ll be escaping with only you
To many phases and places
Again and again, now and always
And through out all the coming years of any age …

It’s my personal favourite with some error, here and there. And I know it’s a bit long than my usual ones, but I love this long poem and I hope you would love it too to read it all ….

And here I mentioned about Taj Mahal ….
Don’t know why I didn’t mention Pahalgam or the BETAAB Valley … Kashmir is my recent favourite place, absolutely, say like forever ♾️ 🥰

So should I include the place in this Royal Escape? Tell me ….

And tell me also where would you escape if there’s any chance of you being able to take such escape …

Forelsket

I’m sorry I took a lot of time
I never thought
You would notice let alone ask me about it ….
So I am a bit nervous, feeling a bit overwhelmed
It’s a bit difficult for me …
Can the answer wait?
I may reply a bit later but
I don’t know
May be or may be not …
If I do not take time now
And say that I wish to say …
Then it may sound vulnerable
Again it may or may not be
To you; I do not know ….
Just your presence lingering for a long, long, long time now without a trace of heartache …
And it’s better unsaid to you …
May be or may be not
But I’ve never been happier to fall like this …
And then I’m a bit upset also
That you’ve noticed
Even if you noticed
Why did you have to ask me?
You made me awkward …
And that’s why I was a bit upset …
Couldn’t you be silent?
There are so many things to tell
I have so many words to say
May be not now, or may be now
I believe it’s happening
You’re becoming my idle thoughts …
Then what’s the fuss about it?
Then what’s that ‘May be or may be not’ at all? …

Forelsket/ norwegian
(n.) the euphoria experienced you begin to fall in love

——————~falling in love~———————

Querencia

Sometimes
all you need is going to
somewhere quiet
and
you are my
‘Somewhere Quiet’ place
always ….

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Querencia / Spanish /kɛˈrɛnθɪə, Spanish keˈrenθja, keˈrensja/
(adj.) a place where one feels safe, a place where one feels at home …

Just thought to add an audio of these verses. Excuse my terrible voice and poor sound effects🙏 I took quite a few attempts for this and lastly I thought, ‘Okay, let it be.’ 🤷🏿‍♀️

I know you all are kind, compassionate and thoughtful.

Thank you ✨ Smiles for you ☺️

Trouvaille

diamond is forever

.

that
you’re a diamond
is true; cause
you sparkle
so


i sparkle;
just as a dew on
a petal; you shine
then i shine
through
you.


you twinkle
there on i twinkle
like a beautiful star
cause a diamond
is forever,
its true.

cause you’re
my diamond
and i love you and
its forever
too.

.

.

trouvaille /truːˈvʌɪ/ French tru vi /
(n.) something or someone lovely discovered by a chance. a lucky find.

Love Letters

Love letters, for you. Never sent …

.

.


Towards You

It wanders towards you – my heart

.

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Grey isn’t What I’m Meant to be …

Life is somewhat grey
Everywhere
Just monotony
Lost and lonely …

Don’t you know?

Only when you stay
Life is colorful ….
A hopeful glow
Echoes of brighter joy
Birds sing cheerful songs
Rays of sunshines warm my cheeks
My yellow dyed dreams return …

Now it’s grey
Everywhere …

When will you come?
Without you, I feel grey ….

Don’t you know?
Grey isn’t what I’m meant to be …

A Home

I haven’t met you
I haven’t seen you
But often I feel a home in you …

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Where the glacier meets the sky, the land ceases to be earthly, and the earth becomes one with the heavens; no sorrows live there anymore, and therefore joy is not necessary; beauty alone reigns there, beyond all demands”-

Halldór Laxness

A Postcard from Kashmir

I wish …

I wish
I were a bird!
So that I could
Fly to you
Just right now …